Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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