you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
