porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
19 Unhappily Married People Confess The Red Flags They Ignored
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
These 23 People Destroyed Their Entire Lives In An Instant
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself