She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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