Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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