His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
vagina is talking i cant
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
