Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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