In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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