Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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