Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...