Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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