you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
