we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Randomize
