my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
where am i from again
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize