i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You need Xanax blowdarts
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
