I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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