He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
