how can u be prego again
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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