i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize