Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
