i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
