He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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