i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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