I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
