words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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