did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
