sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
