There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Randomize