He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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