just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
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