something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
