maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
