Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
