so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
