You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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