Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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