how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
