So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
