Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
