Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
