So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.