KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake