apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Randomize
