Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize