I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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