He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
