I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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