So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
