I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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