Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
