We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
